“Fathers, (parents) do not irritate and provoke your children to anger [do not exasperate them to resentment], but rear them [tenderly] in the training and discipline and the counsel and admonition of the Lord.” Amplified Bible, Classic Edition
It always fascinates me that many “believers” remember the first part of chapter 6 of Ephesians, but omit the following verse above that sustains a healthy relationship between parent and child.
To provoke toddlers, children or teens to rage - tears at the fabric of innocence, freedom, self-esteem and trust with parents and caretakers alike. I learned in Rehab and several years of group sessions, that ‘emotional shotgun wounds’ comes from those closest to us. Namely our parents, and/or caretakers when we are young.
Of the thirty or more group and individual one-on-one counseling sessions I willingly participated in; this was the only topic I got up and walked out of. The intensity of revisiting long buried horrific memories and events was too real to examine with adult eyes. The percentile of those willing to ‘go there’ to find the KEYS back to self and freedom, hovered right below 10% regardless of gender.
Women in Rehab - 99% Sexually or Physically Assaulted as Children
The number of stories shared among women in Rehab and Recovery from addictive behavior - seemed to always lead back to childhood trauma…kept quiet. Violent physical, mental and emotional abuse was the secondary trauma most commonly mentioned in group sessions. There were many years of tears that flowed freely to the brave ones desperate for peace of mind and freedom from past violations from adults during childhood.
Hurt People? Hurt People - Unless they have tools to heal
When traumatic events from childhood are not healed it leaks into adulthood without tools to cope with the stresses of life. Unfortunately, if left wounded without care, those broken children become broken adults with neurotic fear driven habits of blame or escape into self-destruction.
The Victim Card - Breeds Entitlement and hinders Courage
“At that point Peter got up the nerve to ask, “Master, how many times do I forgive a brother or sister who hurts me? Seven?” Jesus replied, “Seven! Hardly. Try seventy times seven.” Matthew 18:21-22 The Message, Bible version
“Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.” Matthew 22:37-40 KJV, Bible version
“You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.” 1 John 4:4 NIV Bible
“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18 NIV Bible
After sleeping on the topic that disturbed me the previous day, I went back to group. The brave ones that were willing to expolore and find the Keys to Emotional shotgun wounds, were set free! I ended up leading the way in group - cried a river of tears and the domino effect was unstoppable for the others. Finally relief for me and other brave men and women including teenagers found Real Freedom. After years of buried secrets wrapped in lies - the Truth provided amazing Keys to unlock addictive, emotional and spirital prisons of the mind. Freedom is sweet fosho! 😂 A peaceful life…equipped with tools to avoid entanglement.
The REWARD
Fruits of the Spirit - (Galatians 5:22-23 Bible)
Love
Joy
Peace
Patience
Kindness
Goodness
Faithfulness
Gentleness
Self-control
Find your freedom, you are worth it…
You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent.
King David, Psalm 30:11-12 NIV Bible
Terry’s Substack is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a paid subscriber.
